The Power of Words

The words we speak and the words spoken to us are powerful.  This has been on my heart for some time now.  I am generally a very kind person.  I try not to say things or do things that might hurt someone's feelings.  I try to handle situations, good or bad and do not only what is necessary to help someone out, but also in a way that is calm and loving.  While I think that is the right thing for me to do and the way I have lived my life, I can see where not speaking the truth of my heart and keeping silent has allowed unkindness into my life.

I have been asking God to show me the answer to something big in my life that has been a burden and I had yet to get an answer from him.  That is until early this morning.  As I awakened from a dream this morning, I knew it was a God moment.  I love those!  It was in that dream that I received my answer!

Over the last few years, since being single, I have forgiven many, many things that happened in my life and it has been tremendously healing.  There's one problem though I have not been able to get a handle on.  I can feel this anger deep inside my heart and I
couldn't quite figure out what was causing it.  That has been my prayer to God.  I wanted to know what the root cause of it was.  I knew the only way I would be able let it go was to know where it was coming from.  This anger usually surfaced around things that were really unimportant.  Things like, almost the minute I got behind the wheel of my car.  I could feel the anger welling up inside for no reason.  I would feel frustration, impatience, hostility.  I didn't like that at all.  It seemed the more I tried to control it the worse it was.  Much of the anger was directed at me.  I would be angry at myself for so many small things.  I realized that I couldn't truly love myself if I was mad at myself.  I really needed this answer.  I also know that God has a perfect plan.  He has perfect timing.  Although I had spent much time trying to figure out the answer, He kept it secret.

So, back to my dream.  My dream was showing me about the words that had been spoken to me through my lifetime. I felt the pain in my heart of each and every one of those words.  In my dream I was talking and telling the people saying those words how the words had affected me.  I was calm and caring about it.  There was no yelling or anger, just me saying how all those words made me feel. While doing that,  I could feel and see the anger releasing.  I saw my heart opening up the the unkind words floating slowly out of my heart and into the air.  I watched them until I couldn't see them anymore.  It was liberating and it was healing.  You see, I have never been able to do that.  I almost always just take the words spoken to me in silence.  I am hurt.  I cry.  I try to reason with those words in my head and I go over and over (in my head) what I would say back, but never have.  I have kept so many hurtful words in my heart.  How could it be anything but angry.

When I was waking up out my dream, it was very slowly.  I was actually awake and still the thoughts of my dream were going through my head.  I think that's because God wanted to make sure I got it.  He wanted to make sure I realized the healing I had just received from Him.  I realized that I had been manifesting the anger of accepting all those unkind words in silence and allowing them to be released in those small ways that I thought I could control.

Today, I woke up being blessed!  I was blessed with an answer.  I was blessed with healing.  Words are so powerful.  They can lift you up.  They can inspire.  They can bring joy and kindness.  They can bring peace.  They can also hurt.  They can be destructive.  They can be cruel.  They can destroy self esteem. They can be forgiven, but never forgotten.

What I understand now, after my dream, is that I won't be able to forget all those words because once words are said, they cannot be taken back.  I have however realized that I released the pain by forgiving them and I have defused the anger by acknowledging them and how they made me feel.  Now I know that if and when they are thought of again, they will have no power over me.  That's the victory!  I also understand that I can no longer silently accept unkind words.  I cannot allow them to live and build up in my heart again.  I have to find a way to express not repress.  That's going to be very hard for me, but I'm going to do my best because after all,  it's my heart.  So the take away here is that before words are spoken, remember that they can be apologized for, but the damage they do can take a lifetime to repair.  Before words are spoken, think about how they would make you feel if they were said to you.  Today and every day, I am blessed!

ToDaY I ChOoSe KiNdNeSs OvEr AnGeR!

ThiS Is My YeAr!

I'm not a New Year's resolution person.  I don't make them.  I never have.  I always saw so many people make resolutions and then a few weeks, or maybe months later they've gone back to their old habits and they feel like a failure.  I look at resolutions as the world's attempt to keep us feeling like we are unworthy.

What I have been doing over the last 4 1/2 years is putting my new life together.  One of those steps was choosing something about myself that I would like to change for the better and then working on that.  When I say something about myself, I mean something on the inside.  My first big challenge was to learn to love the person looking back at me in the mirror.  I would have to say, by far, that was the hardest one for me and the most rewarding!  I really do love me!  That doesn't come from ego by thinking that I am outwardly beautiful.  It comes from inside my heart by knowing that I am beautiful on the inside.  I like who I am.

I decided a few months ago, way before New Year's Eve that 2015 was going to be my year!  It is!  I can feel it.  I have an overwhelming faith that it will be!  I have that bubbling up, excited, overflowing, joyful expectation in my heart that God is going to bless me abundantly more than I could ever imagine this year!

Yesterday afternoon I took a beginners Yoga workshop and it physically kicked my butt!  I have not been physically active in a few years and I've decided it's time to get back in the game of life.  However, I do realize that it is not going to be easy!  I'm ready to put in the work.  I said all that to say that I was very sore this morning and didn't go to church so I turned on Joel O'Steen to listen to him.  I really like listening to his messages.  Guess what his message was about today?  You guessed it, "This is your year!"  I started smiling and thinking, "Ok God.  This is awesome!"  God was confirming to me again through Joel's message that this is my year!  Woohoo!

There are several things that I would love to see happen in my life this year
and God knows what they are, but I'm not going to limit myself to those.  I know that what God has in mind to bless me abundantly with is so much more than my small mind could imagine.  I have already had a major blessing this year and it's only January!

Just so you know, it's your year too!  It is!  Just have faith.  Keep telling yourself this is my year!  This is my year of abundant blessings and see what happens.  Don't expect things to go badly.  Expect them to go good!  As a matter of fact, expect them to go abundantly good!  Even when your in a situation where you can't possibly see how anything good could be happening, it can and it will!  Whether it's poor health, a lack of financial resources, unmet needs, etc., abundance can and will be given to you, if you will just allow them into your life!  It doesn't require luck.  All it requires if for you to ask and then believe that it will happen.  Unwavering faith!

Oh YeS!  I Am BLeSsEd!