Faith!

I love faith!  Faith is the ability to step into the uncertain.  Faith is a confidence, not a certainty.  Those are the words that our youth pastor used to describe faith.  And he is right.  Every time I have had to have faith it was for the unseen, or the unknown outcome. 

Jesus said, "The simple truth is that if you had a mere kernel, a poppy seed, say, you would tell this mountain, "Move!' and it would move.  There is nothing you wouldn't be able to tackle."  (Message Bible, Matthew 17.20)

This is one of my favorite bible verses, though, before divorce, I'm not sure I understood exactly what it would mean to me.  From almost the minute I realized my marriage was over, I used many, many verses from the bible to get me through the toughest time in my life that I could ever imagine.  The above one, though, I think I have repeated millions of times, and still do!  It wasn't until recently though that the definition of "mountain" became so clear to me.  That's what I want to share.

Every one of us has come upon hard times.  Every one of us at some point in our life, didn't think we

could survive today, let alone tomorrow.  I know I was surviving second by second, and even that at many times seemed unattainable.  Now I had faith that God would get me through it.......eventually.  I'm not afraid to admit that there were many times that I lost faith.  Times I was so frustrated and so angry at God for taking soooo long.  After all, I needed to move on.  I was ready!  Or was I?

The other morning, as I was walking on the beach and having my usual morning conversation with God, faith and moving mountains came to my mind.  All of a sudden it hit me.  At least in my case, God was not talking about a physical mountain.  He was telling me to move the mountains out of my life!  Move the mountains that are keeping me from moving forward.  Move the mountains out of my way!  When I hit one of my mountains, it's like hitting a brick wall.  I stop!  I get thrown back a few feet and I fall down!  Sometimes I almost have a panic attack!  Then I have to pick myself up and re-take those few steps forward, again!  This revelation is huge! I can see all the possibilities now!

So what are some of my mountains?  Fear, self-doubt, and uncertainty  Fear is by far my biggest mountain.  I have made great strides though in the last couple of years!  I've definitely been able to conquer some of my fears already, but there are many more.  Each new adventure is a "mountain moving" experience and I'm loving it! 

This is what I do now that I've figured out what God was telling me:  When one of those mountains get in my way, I say, "Ok mountain of ___________, GET OUT OF MY WAY!  For me that seems to give me enough courage not to give up! 

So maybe, just maybe, the next time you are facing a mountain of your own, you will try my experiment and demand the mountain to get out of your way!  Then have the smallest amount of faith that God will move that mountain for you.  He absolutely will!

I feel a new tattoo coming on!  Just saying!

FaiTh MoVeS MoUnTaiNs!

Saying Goodbye

There are so many ways we have to say goodbye. Some are temporary and some are permanent.  Goodbyes can be happy or they can be unbelievably sad.

When someone you love comes to visit, whether it's family or  friends, when it's time for them to leave, it's tough to say goodbye.  Of course you know that goodbye is temporary, but you still get that aching in your heart.   When someone you love dies, that's a permanent goodbye that's very hard to accept.  It takes a long time to get over that goodbye. You leave a job for a new one or you retire and you have to say goodbye to friends that have become like a second family to you.  That's hard, but you have the opportunity to keep in touch. You also get to start a new chapter in your life.  Beginning new chapters is what life is all about.  Nothing ever stays the same forever.

I had to say goodbye recently.   For those of you who follow my blog, (And I thank every one of

you!), a few blogs ago I decided that it was time to put my heart back in the game of love!   When I figured out that in the heart is where love lives, I had no choice.  How else am I ever going to find the love of my life?  I knew it was risky.  I knew I was going to be taking chances, but to find love, my guy, I knew I had to risk my heart.

A few weeks ago,  I met a great guy.  I was hoping that he was my guy.  After all, I put my heart back in the game, right?  God promised me He would protect my heart.  I was set. I was ready.  How could this fail?  So what happened?  He was not my guy.  I had a wonderful time though.  I got to experience so many things I had never done, food I had never tried, and places I have never been.  That said, it was sad  to realize that he was not my guy.  I have to tell you that I had the opportunity to make the most wonderful memories!   I get to use these awesome memories to start replacing a lifetime of memories I would certainly rather forget!  Wow!  How blessed am I?

The hard part was having to accept that as great a guy as he was, he was not my guy.  You see, if I haven't learned anything else, I've learned that I have expectations for my guy that I cannot comprise on.  I have things that I need.  My guy is going to fulfill all of those and more!  I know that!  It is God's promise to me.  That I do not doubt!

So right now I'm going to take some time to regroup.  I'm going to give myself a break.  I'm not going to think too much.  I'm just going to enjoy the adventure that I've been on!  I'm going to rejoice in the fact that I was brave enough to give love a shot!  And brave enough to say goodbye when I realized I needed to!  This is such a huge breakthrough for me! 

I'm going to eventually pick myself up, dust myself off, pray a lot and get back out there in the game of love!  After all, my guy is out there waiting on me to be brave enough to try again!  I can't let him down now can I?

My Heart Will Find A Home!